A few years ago, I remember hearing a lecture by Dr. Jay Wile at a homeschool convention, where he stated that science labs are not necessary, even for high school students. My kids were little at the time, so I didn't give it much thought. Until yesterday.
All of a sudden, it hit me. What he said sank in. I'm not sure if it's because I've been planning my 7th grader's high school years already, or because my friends with high schoolers seem to be worried about getting enough science lab experiments, but it really came full circle and suddenly made a lot of sense.
Dr. Jay Wile has expressed that experiments and teaching your child to use the scientific method early on are very important in the elementary years. As they enter middle school and high school, they should switch gears to focus on more gaining of knowledge than how many experiments they can do. (Dr. Jay’s Top 10 Homeschool Science Tips). He has also said that, "Labs are fun and interesting, but not a necessary part of learning." (Page 7 of these notes, which are the exact notes given to us at the lecture. You will find other interesting information included!)
Now, my question is, if labs aren't that important to the author of science textbooks and a former university professor, why are moms going out of our way to spend money and time shuttling our kids to science classes so they can get lab experience?
My guess is because we did labs in school, and we don't want to "neglect" our children just because they are homeschooled. Also, if you pay attention at all to what public schools do (or argue about when it comes to money), you know how much emphasis the school boards put on new and improved science labs, and you may have even seen them spend hundreds of thousands more to relocate classrooms to upgrade science labs to some arbitrary standard set by someone, somewhere (Washington?) So we were told in school, lab time is important. We are told by the school board, we MUST have the best labs in our schools. (Which is ironic given the failure of our schools already, right?) You really have to get off the ride and stop and think about it for a minute. How many students actually have ANY interest in pursuing science, and how many actually do?
Now let me tell you something that might blow you away. I don't know how many hours I spent in the lab in junior high and high school. But I did not spend ONE MINUTE in a lab during my four years in college. GASP! And guess what I ended up teaching my first year after graduation? Seventh grade science! Let that sink in a minute.
And let me be perfectly honest, there are high school graduates who make better teachers than those with college degrees.
After taking the usual biology, chemistry, physics, (and I also took extra science, including anatomy/physiology) in high school, I did not want to repeat those courses in college. So I took an astronomy class and a class on the physics of sound, both of which were very interesting. But the truth is, there is a very small fraction of people who EVER need to know what even happens in a lab. Those people should do as many labs as they need to. The average student...not so much!
So don't worry about fitting that science lab with other homeschoolers into your schedule. If it's right down the street and fits your schedule perfectly and you happen to have extra money laying around to pay for it, go for it. But don't stress out if you don't or can't do labs. Your student will not suffer for it and the world WILL go on. I promise!
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Block Scheduling for Homeschoolers
This year in our homeschool, we tried something different. "Experts" refer to it as block scheduling: having fewer classes (or subjects) each day. The way we blocked our school year is into semesters. We took the classes for the year, divided them into two groups, and then did half of the classes in fall semester, and the other half of classes in spring semester.
So, how's it going?
Wonderfully. So wonderfully, in fact, that we aren't even finished with the school year and I had to tell you how well it's going.
Fall semester consisted of history, science, grammar, and smaller classes like health, logic, and for my daughter, spelling (which she will work on all year).
Spring semester consists of reading/literature, writing, and math.
This schedule is working out for us for numerous reasons. First, it works better for me. As a work at home mom who also happens to be single, it has kept me sane. I only have to worry about a few subjects daily. Also, I chose the more tedious subjects (the ones that tend to get neglected) for the start of our year, and will finish the year with the more enjoyable subjects (for me/us anyway). So when spring fever sets in, we will be working on subjects that we will have an easier time completing.
Secondly, my kids are spending more time on their subjects daily, rather than going from one to the next quickly. Imagine only reflecting on three ideas you focused on that day, rather than six or more. This gives them the time to go more in depth with what they learn, as well as tying it in with what they already know. Cramming more information into one day tends to prevent in depth learning on any given subject.
Finally, it helps with cost management. Except for the textbooks I will hand down to my younger child, we aren't holding on to texts all year. As soon as we are done with it, I sell the curriculum to make room for the next semester. It also allows me to find good deals during the school year rather than buying everything at one time, in late summer or early fall, when everyone else is shopping. Right now I'm scoping out deals for next year, as I already know what we will be doing. I guess that's more a benefit of planning, while the block scheduling helps me spread out the money being spent.
You might be wondering how old my kids are. They are currently in 6th and 7th grades. I wonder if we could have used this schedule when they were younger, as I've heard many moms say, "That won't work for my child because they have to have math everyday." Or, "I could see doing it when they are older, but when they are younger, topics need to be reinforced daily." I can tell you that these arguments are not valid in my home. I believe if I had done a similar schedule from early on, it would have worked just as easily- with my kids. Everyone has different needs and kids learn differently. Before you write it off in your family, imagine what it would be like and see if it might work in your home. It breaks away from the mold a bit, and for us, it has turned out to be a huge blessing as I've retained my sanity this year. A LOT of homeschool moms can't say that at the end of May! (I will report back in, I know it's only the end of January!)
So, how's it going?
Wonderfully. So wonderfully, in fact, that we aren't even finished with the school year and I had to tell you how well it's going.
Fall semester consisted of history, science, grammar, and smaller classes like health, logic, and for my daughter, spelling (which she will work on all year).
Spring semester consists of reading/literature, writing, and math.
This schedule is working out for us for numerous reasons. First, it works better for me. As a work at home mom who also happens to be single, it has kept me sane. I only have to worry about a few subjects daily. Also, I chose the more tedious subjects (the ones that tend to get neglected) for the start of our year, and will finish the year with the more enjoyable subjects (for me/us anyway). So when spring fever sets in, we will be working on subjects that we will have an easier time completing.
Secondly, my kids are spending more time on their subjects daily, rather than going from one to the next quickly. Imagine only reflecting on three ideas you focused on that day, rather than six or more. This gives them the time to go more in depth with what they learn, as well as tying it in with what they already know. Cramming more information into one day tends to prevent in depth learning on any given subject.
Finally, it helps with cost management. Except for the textbooks I will hand down to my younger child, we aren't holding on to texts all year. As soon as we are done with it, I sell the curriculum to make room for the next semester. It also allows me to find good deals during the school year rather than buying everything at one time, in late summer or early fall, when everyone else is shopping. Right now I'm scoping out deals for next year, as I already know what we will be doing. I guess that's more a benefit of planning, while the block scheduling helps me spread out the money being spent.
You might be wondering how old my kids are. They are currently in 6th and 7th grades. I wonder if we could have used this schedule when they were younger, as I've heard many moms say, "That won't work for my child because they have to have math everyday." Or, "I could see doing it when they are older, but when they are younger, topics need to be reinforced daily." I can tell you that these arguments are not valid in my home. I believe if I had done a similar schedule from early on, it would have worked just as easily- with my kids. Everyone has different needs and kids learn differently. Before you write it off in your family, imagine what it would be like and see if it might work in your home. It breaks away from the mold a bit, and for us, it has turned out to be a huge blessing as I've retained my sanity this year. A LOT of homeschool moms can't say that at the end of May! (I will report back in, I know it's only the end of January!)
Friday, January 17, 2014
What to Do When You Accidentally Delete Photos From Your Camera
At 1:21 am, my eleven year-old daughter woke me up, in tears.
"Mommy, I accidentally deleted ALL the photos off my camera!"
I'm not sure what she thought I could do. But wait...WHY is she still up?
Earlier in the evening, she had shown me the images for her Barbie stop motion video. She had spent about ten hours on it, which if you know anything about stop motion, relates to about a 30 second video. Watching the pictures quickly go from one to the next, I could tell that the video is going to be hilarious. No, seriously, I laughed so hard, it took me a minute to catch my breath. So THIS is what she had been doing when she was supposed to be doing her school work!
But now they were all gone. Hours of work were wasted.
"Maybe God made me do this because He knew I could do a better one," she said, trying to look on the bright side.
Maybe He was punishing you for not doing your school work first, I thought.
I was already on the computer, Googling "how to retrieve images deleted from SD card." I knew it was pointless, but I had to look like I was trying to do something to help.
It turns out, it wasn't pointless. Did you know that even though it says they are deleted, they aren't? Just like deleting things from your hard drive, they are still there. You might not be able to find them, but someone could if they wanted to and if they knew how. I downloaded a program called Panda Recovery for- get this- FREE. And...it WORKED! One after another, 532 photos were retrieved and my girl was happy again. So there ya go.
You might think the story is over, but it's not. As I got back into bed with a smile, I decided that while MOST of the time I have to be the "bad guy," it feels good to be the hero. It makes all those other times worth it. Today, I'm back to the bad guy again because someone has to get her school work done...
"Mommy, I accidentally deleted ALL the photos off my camera!"
I'm not sure what she thought I could do. But wait...WHY is she still up?
Earlier in the evening, she had shown me the images for her Barbie stop motion video. She had spent about ten hours on it, which if you know anything about stop motion, relates to about a 30 second video. Watching the pictures quickly go from one to the next, I could tell that the video is going to be hilarious. No, seriously, I laughed so hard, it took me a minute to catch my breath. So THIS is what she had been doing when she was supposed to be doing her school work!
But now they were all gone. Hours of work were wasted.
"Maybe God made me do this because He knew I could do a better one," she said, trying to look on the bright side.
Maybe He was punishing you for not doing your school work first, I thought.
I was already on the computer, Googling "how to retrieve images deleted from SD card." I knew it was pointless, but I had to look like I was trying to do something to help.
It turns out, it wasn't pointless. Did you know that even though it says they are deleted, they aren't? Just like deleting things from your hard drive, they are still there. You might not be able to find them, but someone could if they wanted to and if they knew how. I downloaded a program called Panda Recovery for- get this- FREE. And...it WORKED! One after another, 532 photos were retrieved and my girl was happy again. So there ya go.
You might think the story is over, but it's not. As I got back into bed with a smile, I decided that while MOST of the time I have to be the "bad guy," it feels good to be the hero. It makes all those other times worth it. Today, I'm back to the bad guy again because someone has to get her school work done...
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
What do I do with all these stuffed animals?!
My kids have a gazillion little stuffed animals that they just can't seem to part with. My daughter stored hers on a shelf in her room, but she needed the shelf space for all her hair accessories and jewelry. I looked on Pinterest a little bit, and didn't really find anything that jumped out at me, so I decided to make a trip to Lowe's to see what I could find that might work. Lattice! I decided not to nail this to the wall since we might be moving soon. I used a few nails in the beam in our basement and the stuffed animals are super happy. This piece is 4' x 8', but it is easy to cut if it's too large. I happened to get a multi-purpose tool pretty cheap at woot.com just before getting the lattice and got to try it out. I just had to cut one row off since the beam was lower than the ceiling. This size lattice was $17.98 at our Lowe's. For the animals that didn't fit in the holes, my daughter used her Rainbow Loom to make straps to hold them on. She hasn't finished putting on all her stuffed animals. She wanted me to make sure you knew that!
Binding Your Child's Stories Into Books
Thirty years ago, when I was in the sixth grade, I had an awesome artsy teacher who LOVED making us do projects that were crafty. At the time, it was a tedious project, and I certainly did not appreciate getting to do it, but one of the things she taught us was how to bind our stories into our own self-made books.
I bring this up now, because recently my daughter came across the books I had made, and read them over and over. Then my son joined in. I saw how much they liked them, so I said, "We can make these when we start our writing curriculum next semester."
"Okay!!" they both exclaimed excitedly.
What? My kids were excited about writing? I mean, they don't hate writing, but HAVING to write something can be laborious and not so fun. Now, however, they had a purpose. If they wrote a great story and bound it in a cool book, they have something to keep forever!
Even though it wasn't time to start our writing curriculum, I wanted to take advantage of their excitement, so I had them write a Halloween story, a Thanksgiving story, and a Christmas story. I expected to get a three to four page story at most, but my daughter actually wrote...get this...a chapter book! I couldn't believe it! And it was good! My son decided to write a series using the same characters and he did a great job as well. I do have to admit that my daughter's got shorter each story that she wrote, so I know that the assignments were too frequent in such a short time period (two months). She is the little critic, however, and said about my stories, "Some of these don't really have endings..." She was right! I had run out of time in the classroom, so they just stopped with no real ending. The joys of being homeschooled and being able to finish projects...
Here are their books. I challenge you to try this with your child, or come up with other ways to excite your kids about writing! If you are curious about how to make these, we will be creating and uploading a video soon!
I bring this up now, because recently my daughter came across the books I had made, and read them over and over. Then my son joined in. I saw how much they liked them, so I said, "We can make these when we start our writing curriculum next semester."
"Okay!!" they both exclaimed excitedly.
What? My kids were excited about writing? I mean, they don't hate writing, but HAVING to write something can be laborious and not so fun. Now, however, they had a purpose. If they wrote a great story and bound it in a cool book, they have something to keep forever!
Even though it wasn't time to start our writing curriculum, I wanted to take advantage of their excitement, so I had them write a Halloween story, a Thanksgiving story, and a Christmas story. I expected to get a three to four page story at most, but my daughter actually wrote...get this...a chapter book! I couldn't believe it! And it was good! My son decided to write a series using the same characters and he did a great job as well. I do have to admit that my daughter's got shorter each story that she wrote, so I know that the assignments were too frequent in such a short time period (two months). She is the little critic, however, and said about my stories, "Some of these don't really have endings..." She was right! I had run out of time in the classroom, so they just stopped with no real ending. The joys of being homeschooled and being able to finish projects...
Here are their books. I challenge you to try this with your child, or come up with other ways to excite your kids about writing! If you are curious about how to make these, we will be creating and uploading a video soon!
Monday, January 6, 2014
A Great Poem
Here is a poem from a young friend of mine that you might enjoy reading...
True
We've heard it in lesson after lesson
We've seen it when people cry
The words they hurt
They bruise and bleed
And we just turn our eyes
How long can we sit and live like this
While we know that others die
Inside and out they're broken
Till they can't bare it anymore
But this shouldn't be the case, I say
When we're taught to offer love
Acceptance, truth, and understanding
Should be the only thing we show
So lets stop this injustice, this cruelty, this lie
This isn't what we're meant for
To spit in others eyes
To get comfortable in our pews
Or to sing in a church choir
This is not what we should do
I'm here to offer one last word
A suggestion that is due
Let's practice what we preach
And show the world we are true
~Morgan Elizabeth
True
We've heard it in lesson after lesson
We've seen it when people cry
The words they hurt
They bruise and bleed
And we just turn our eyes
How long can we sit and live like this
While we know that others die
Inside and out they're broken
Till they can't bare it anymore
But this shouldn't be the case, I say
When we're taught to offer love
Acceptance, truth, and understanding
Should be the only thing we show
So lets stop this injustice, this cruelty, this lie
This isn't what we're meant for
To spit in others eyes
To get comfortable in our pews
Or to sing in a church choir
This is not what we should do
I'm here to offer one last word
A suggestion that is due
Let's practice what we preach
And show the world we are true
~Morgan Elizabeth
Monday, December 23, 2013
How to Keep Porn Out of Your Child's Hands
In two days, tweens and teens across the country will be receiving all sorts of electronic devices under the tree which their parents barely know what they are capable of. For some, it will be their first ever experience with porn. Why? Because if it's not a laptop or PC, many parents have absolutely no clue that the device they just gifted to their children has direct access to the web, with no filters, granting them direct access to pornography.
Before I continue, I'd like to share a video I saw at church recently. This is actually a secular video, showing the problem is NOT just something that Christians are concerned about.
We Need To Talk... from Fight the New Drug on Vimeo.
My awareness of the porn problem was heightened when I learned recently that a teen instructed his friend on how to disable parental controls on his phone AT CHURCH. So it's very important to start the conversations earlier than you think, and for reasons you may not expect. And don't forget to talk to your girls... they are doing unimaginable things and getting addicted to pornography as well.
With gaming systems, your best bet is to use the appropriate built in parental control tools as well as monitor your child's use (and make sure they didn't disable the controls). These systems will likely be installed and kept in your home. How about your children's friends' homes? Have a conversation with these parents to see what the level of acceptance is and you might be shocked to find a parent that is completely oblivious to the gaming system's capabilities. Even worse, you might discover a "boys will be boys" mentality that makes you want to run for the hills. They are out there. Trust me.
In my opinion, the worst offenders are the mobile devices that kids can take with them wherever they go, without you over their shoulders to make sure their use is clean. THAT is where things get dicey. That's where Covenant Eyes comes in. While it can still be used at home on Windows 7, Vista, and XP PCs, as well as Mac computers, it can also be installed on iPhone®, iPod touch®, iPad®, and Android™ phones and tablets (like Kindle Fire and Kindle Fire HD).
Covenant Eyes is a popular product used by many Christian men to hold themselves accountable. Once it is installed, a friend, wife, parent, or mentor can receive emails showing everywhere the user went on his system, and everything s/he searched for. You can use this same product for your children's devices, and make yourself his/her accountability monitor. I have been receiving emails every three days (you can set the frequency) about my son's internet usage and it is very thorough. It will even detect if your child has attempted to navigate around the system.
Perhaps your child wanted that iPod touch® SO bad so he could listen to music. Just because their intent is innocent does not mean that giving them that tool can't turn into a disaster rather quickly. What if your 10 year old takes his to church where he encounters a 12 year old who wants to show him what it will do? Just because you are having conversations with YOUR child, don't assume everyone is. MOST are not.
The porn problem is going through the roof. If we don't protect our children while we have them, they ARE getting access to pornography. Addictions usually start at an early age. Talk to your kids, let them know the expectations, and do your best to prevent porn from getting onto their screens. Also, if your child has a school issued laptop or iPad®, don't assume there are any parental controls installed. I found out the hard way that ours had NOTHING installed when we used a virtual homeschool for two years.
Here is more info you might be interested in:
The Porn Problem sermon at Riverlawn Christian Church
Covenant Eyes 2013 Pornography Statistics Report
Before I continue, I'd like to share a video I saw at church recently. This is actually a secular video, showing the problem is NOT just something that Christians are concerned about.
We Need To Talk... from Fight the New Drug on Vimeo.
My awareness of the porn problem was heightened when I learned recently that a teen instructed his friend on how to disable parental controls on his phone AT CHURCH. So it's very important to start the conversations earlier than you think, and for reasons you may not expect. And don't forget to talk to your girls... they are doing unimaginable things and getting addicted to pornography as well.
With gaming systems, your best bet is to use the appropriate built in parental control tools as well as monitor your child's use (and make sure they didn't disable the controls). These systems will likely be installed and kept in your home. How about your children's friends' homes? Have a conversation with these parents to see what the level of acceptance is and you might be shocked to find a parent that is completely oblivious to the gaming system's capabilities. Even worse, you might discover a "boys will be boys" mentality that makes you want to run for the hills. They are out there. Trust me.
In my opinion, the worst offenders are the mobile devices that kids can take with them wherever they go, without you over their shoulders to make sure their use is clean. THAT is where things get dicey. That's where Covenant Eyes comes in. While it can still be used at home on Windows 7, Vista, and XP PCs, as well as Mac computers, it can also be installed on iPhone®, iPod touch®, iPad®, and Android™ phones and tablets (like Kindle Fire and Kindle Fire HD).
Covenant Eyes is a popular product used by many Christian men to hold themselves accountable. Once it is installed, a friend, wife, parent, or mentor can receive emails showing everywhere the user went on his system, and everything s/he searched for. You can use this same product for your children's devices, and make yourself his/her accountability monitor. I have been receiving emails every three days (you can set the frequency) about my son's internet usage and it is very thorough. It will even detect if your child has attempted to navigate around the system.
Perhaps your child wanted that iPod touch® SO bad so he could listen to music. Just because their intent is innocent does not mean that giving them that tool can't turn into a disaster rather quickly. What if your 10 year old takes his to church where he encounters a 12 year old who wants to show him what it will do? Just because you are having conversations with YOUR child, don't assume everyone is. MOST are not.
The porn problem is going through the roof. If we don't protect our children while we have them, they ARE getting access to pornography. Addictions usually start at an early age. Talk to your kids, let them know the expectations, and do your best to prevent porn from getting onto their screens. Also, if your child has a school issued laptop or iPad®, don't assume there are any parental controls installed. I found out the hard way that ours had NOTHING installed when we used a virtual homeschool for two years.
Here is more info you might be interested in:
The Porn Problem sermon at Riverlawn Christian Church
Covenant Eyes 2013 Pornography Statistics Report
Friday, October 18, 2013
Why I Allow My Kids on Facebook
I did not allow my kids on facebook for quite a while. I saw some of the things that came through on my wall and some of the things that the tweens and teens tend to post, and figured they could wait. I finally let them have their own facebook accounts when my son was almost 12 and my daughter was 10. They had numerous friends through sports and theatre productions that they wanted to keep in touch with and since they don’t attend school, I figured it would be the best way for this to happen.
I gained a lot of insight about the kids of today through monitoring my children’s facebook accounts. As a matter of fact, facebook has allowed me to know things that I otherwise would not have known. This is because when kids are alone, they will talk to one another differently from the way they would if I were in the room. Their language changes, the topics change, and they are cruder with one another.
The first thing I learned is that too many parents have no clue what their kids are doing on facebook. Well, perhaps they know, but they are WAY more lenient than I am. Either way, I’m saddened by the behavior I have observed. Since other parents aren’t monitoring their kids on facebook, these kids assume no parents are. It’s like stepping into their world and being a fly on the wall. (Keep in mind part of this is because children have profiles that aren’t private, or aren’t set that only friends can see what they post.) Also, when your child has a friend with some questionable “friends,” anything those “friends” post will be visible by anyone who reads the thread. I’ve seen cursing, bullying, sexual innuendos, fishing for attention by “drama queens” (and kings!) and general unbecoming behavior that all parents think that others’ kids do (not THEIRS!)
My son has friended people he’s met through friends, and when I saw some of the things they discuss on facebook, I unfriend them. One example is a girl talking about beating someone up. This is just gross. I don’t know why girls feel the need to act this way, but they aren’t going to do it on my son’s facebook page. This girl was not talking about someone she *wanted* to beat up (although she had done that as well), but she told about someone she had beaten up, like it was awesome. My son doesn’t need to start thinking this behavior is okay or normal. It’s not.
I also have a problem with kids talking publically to one another on their pages and saying gross things like, “Goodnight, baby…” Or, “I love you so much…can’t wait till tomorrow,” blah, blah, blah. I mean seriously, they will have a new girlfriend or boyfriend every week! Let me point out that there is NO doubt in my mind that the same kids being all gross with their girlfriends and boyfriends on facebook are the same kids sexting and participating in child porn when they send sexually explicit pictures back and forth. They are at least asking for them. They get away with it, because if parents aren’t monitoring facebook, do you really think they are checking phones?
So why do I let my children on facebook? So I know what’s going on. So I can learn about their friends and which ones I need to monitor better and which ones are more trustworthy. They all act nice to your face, but what are they like behind your back? I’m lucky so far in that my kids think the same behavior I point out above is tacky, gross, and not okay. Because I know what’s going on “out there” I can engage in dialogue with my kids and learn about their thoughts and ideas as I share my opinion of appropriate behavior.
I know my kids are not saints. I know my son is just like those other boys who act differently when their parents aren’t around. I know this because I monitor his phone and see some of the things he has texted. We have talked about setting an example for friends and being the one to pull others up and not being the one pulled down by negative behavior. I can’t make my kids turn out to be great people, but I can sure try my best and stay in contact with their world. It is not fun, but it will be worth it in the end.
Facebook can be your friend. Embrace it and use it as a tool to help your children react appropriately when you aren’t around. You know…when they’re adults.
I gained a lot of insight about the kids of today through monitoring my children’s facebook accounts. As a matter of fact, facebook has allowed me to know things that I otherwise would not have known. This is because when kids are alone, they will talk to one another differently from the way they would if I were in the room. Their language changes, the topics change, and they are cruder with one another.
The first thing I learned is that too many parents have no clue what their kids are doing on facebook. Well, perhaps they know, but they are WAY more lenient than I am. Either way, I’m saddened by the behavior I have observed. Since other parents aren’t monitoring their kids on facebook, these kids assume no parents are. It’s like stepping into their world and being a fly on the wall. (Keep in mind part of this is because children have profiles that aren’t private, or aren’t set that only friends can see what they post.) Also, when your child has a friend with some questionable “friends,” anything those “friends” post will be visible by anyone who reads the thread. I’ve seen cursing, bullying, sexual innuendos, fishing for attention by “drama queens” (and kings!) and general unbecoming behavior that all parents think that others’ kids do (not THEIRS!)
My son has friended people he’s met through friends, and when I saw some of the things they discuss on facebook, I unfriend them. One example is a girl talking about beating someone up. This is just gross. I don’t know why girls feel the need to act this way, but they aren’t going to do it on my son’s facebook page. This girl was not talking about someone she *wanted* to beat up (although she had done that as well), but she told about someone she had beaten up, like it was awesome. My son doesn’t need to start thinking this behavior is okay or normal. It’s not.
I also have a problem with kids talking publically to one another on their pages and saying gross things like, “Goodnight, baby…” Or, “I love you so much…can’t wait till tomorrow,” blah, blah, blah. I mean seriously, they will have a new girlfriend or boyfriend every week! Let me point out that there is NO doubt in my mind that the same kids being all gross with their girlfriends and boyfriends on facebook are the same kids sexting and participating in child porn when they send sexually explicit pictures back and forth. They are at least asking for them. They get away with it, because if parents aren’t monitoring facebook, do you really think they are checking phones?
So why do I let my children on facebook? So I know what’s going on. So I can learn about their friends and which ones I need to monitor better and which ones are more trustworthy. They all act nice to your face, but what are they like behind your back? I’m lucky so far in that my kids think the same behavior I point out above is tacky, gross, and not okay. Because I know what’s going on “out there” I can engage in dialogue with my kids and learn about their thoughts and ideas as I share my opinion of appropriate behavior.
I know my kids are not saints. I know my son is just like those other boys who act differently when their parents aren’t around. I know this because I monitor his phone and see some of the things he has texted. We have talked about setting an example for friends and being the one to pull others up and not being the one pulled down by negative behavior. I can’t make my kids turn out to be great people, but I can sure try my best and stay in contact with their world. It is not fun, but it will be worth it in the end.
Facebook can be your friend. Embrace it and use it as a tool to help your children react appropriately when you aren’t around. You know…when they’re adults.
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Reading List for Boys 9-15
This is a great resource! As a single mom of a young boy, I depend on Google to help me out in certain areas. Finding great books to steer him towards is important. He likes reading, and the video games are starting to take over his reading time, so I've got to act! Anyway, here is a great site recommending books for boys ages 9-15. Also, make sure you read the comments, where readers add their own favorites as well!
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Siblings Who Fight
Do your children fight?
Okay, stop laughing. I know, I know...
But how often do they fight? And to what extreme? What is "normal"? As a homeschooler, my children spend a lot of time together and get on each other's nerves. They sometimes enjoy pushing each other's buttons. It's SUPER aggravating. I just can't stand to listen to the bickering. But on some level I know that their bickering comes from their own aggravation, some of which is caused by me.
If your children are literally beating the crap out of each other, you might have a bigger problem. I don't think this is major news for anyone, but I've come across people who aren't alarmed at all when their kids physically fight. So maybe this is a wake up call to someone out there who doesn't have a grasp on "normal".
Sibling Aggression Linked to Poor Mental Health
Okay, stop laughing. I know, I know...
But how often do they fight? And to what extreme? What is "normal"? As a homeschooler, my children spend a lot of time together and get on each other's nerves. They sometimes enjoy pushing each other's buttons. It's SUPER aggravating. I just can't stand to listen to the bickering. But on some level I know that their bickering comes from their own aggravation, some of which is caused by me.
If your children are literally beating the crap out of each other, you might have a bigger problem. I don't think this is major news for anyone, but I've come across people who aren't alarmed at all when their kids physically fight. So maybe this is a wake up call to someone out there who doesn't have a grasp on "normal".
Sibling Aggression Linked to Poor Mental Health
Friday, May 24, 2013
Why Stretching Is Important for Athletes
I remember a few years ago being really irritated that my son's soccer coach didn't have them stretch before practices and games. I didn't know if I should say something and be one of "those" parents. So I told my son that he should stretch anyway, and then sort of forgot all about it. Then, I noticed he did not sit quite right on the floor. It literally hurt him to sit up. I also noticed that when his entire Tae Kwon Do class was "touching their toes" his was the only back that was curved, with his shoulders pulled forward. Soon after trying to correct this, he was running in the yard playing tag when a pain hit his back and he could not move. Also, for a while, we noticed his ribs were not matching on both sides, but I kept thinking it would correct itself.
I got him under chiropractic care, where we learned that his spine was not straight (hence the ribs being "off" and the pain in his spine). Soon after, the knee pain began. My son (12) plays sports year round. The knee problem came up during soccer, so we got online to see what might be going on.
That's where we found out about Patellar Tendonitis, "Jumper's Knee", and Osgood Schlatter's disease (or syndrome). I immediately made an appointment at the chiropractor, and the doctor spent 30 minutes explaining how to take care of the problem.
The tell-tale symptom that narrowed down the diagnosis was that I knew my son's hamstrings were incredibly tight. You can read why this causes knee problems online. There are even stretches you can have your child do daily at home. I am not here to tell you what to do, as I'm not a doctor. But I'm telling you to have your child athlete stretch before performing sports! The problem is also common during adolescent growth spurts, especially in athletes.
Ironically, the next day at his soccer tournament, I noticed that every player (and referee) with a knee brace on had it on his/her right knee. The chiropractor had said that the prominent knee is the one most affected. How funny I'd never noticed that before!
Anyway, years of not stretching properly, a growth spurt, and his crooked spine all led to tendonitis in his knee. I'd also like to say that as an athlete, and a coach who stretches with my players, it just feels good to stretch, and everything feels better afterwards.
I got him under chiropractic care, where we learned that his spine was not straight (hence the ribs being "off" and the pain in his spine). Soon after, the knee pain began. My son (12) plays sports year round. The knee problem came up during soccer, so we got online to see what might be going on.
That's where we found out about Patellar Tendonitis, "Jumper's Knee", and Osgood Schlatter's disease (or syndrome). I immediately made an appointment at the chiropractor, and the doctor spent 30 minutes explaining how to take care of the problem.
The tell-tale symptom that narrowed down the diagnosis was that I knew my son's hamstrings were incredibly tight. You can read why this causes knee problems online. There are even stretches you can have your child do daily at home. I am not here to tell you what to do, as I'm not a doctor. But I'm telling you to have your child athlete stretch before performing sports! The problem is also common during adolescent growth spurts, especially in athletes.
Ironically, the next day at his soccer tournament, I noticed that every player (and referee) with a knee brace on had it on his/her right knee. The chiropractor had said that the prominent knee is the one most affected. How funny I'd never noticed that before!
Anyway, years of not stretching properly, a growth spurt, and his crooked spine all led to tendonitis in his knee. I'd also like to say that as an athlete, and a coach who stretches with my players, it just feels good to stretch, and everything feels better afterwards.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Common Core State Standards
If you haven't heard yet of "Common Core" then you need to dig yourself out from under that rock. Even as a homeschooler, I have learned about this on Facebook, as well as it being printed on the new Singapore math textbooks. Aren't you SO glad that the math curriculum meets Common Core standards?! Because, what you were teaching before was just rubbish, right?
If you go to "the website" (which I'm not going to link) you will find their mission statement:
The Common Core State Standards provide a consistent, clear understanding of what students are expected to learn, so teachers and parents know what they need to do to help them. The standards are designed to be robust and relevant to the real world, reflecting the knowledge and skills that our young people need for success in college and careers. With American students fully prepared for the future, our communities will be best positioned to compete successfully in the global economy.
Then it goes on...
Building on the excellent foundation of standards states have laid, the Common Core State Standards are the first step in providing our young people with a high-quality education. It should be clear to every student, parent, and teacher what the standards of success are in every school.
Now, I don't believe that it matters AT ALL what the standards actually are. Because the truth is, there have always been standards. You can tweak this or that; you can totally revamp something, but it will not make ONE DENT in the outcome of American students. The "system" is still missing the point.
First, did you catch this, "The Common Core State Standards are the first step in providing our young people with a high-quality education." Really? This is the FIRST step? What have you people been doing for decades, then? What are WE paying you for, to use our kids as guinea pigs?!
If that wasn't bad enough, it seems that the "system" thinks that we are stupid enough to believe that changing this or that in "standards" is the solution to our poor educational outcomes. "If we can just fix THIS, all our problems are solved!"
Well, I hate to tell you this America, but the crappy teachers who hand out worksheets every day and text on their phones 24/7 aren't the problem. The math teachers who can't do fractions aren't the problem. The administrators who act like tyrants aren't the problem. The problem is ACCOUNTABILITY. It should not come from the top down, it should come from the parents up. The problem is that the schools have convinced the parents that their input is not necessary or wanted, and they have told them, "We are the professionals; we know what we are doing. Trust us."
TRUST US. Trust our mountains of paperwork, hours of testing and test prep; trust that we know when your child should eat, or run, or urinate... Trust that your child is learning what he should. Trust us when we feed your kids these GMOs and crappy food, and reward them with colorful candy. Oh, and trust the fluoridated water in our fountains, probably laced with lead from old pipes. And trust that we got a great education in our crappy school systems and know everything we need to know to teach your child.
The problem, parents, is you. Start using your voice and paying attention to what your kid needs to learn. Stop complaining about all the testing and stop sending your kid to be tested! Stop believing the fallacy that you are not integral to your child's success and WAKE UP and make it your priority. Go to your kid's school. See what's going on. If something is going on that you need changed and you can't get through the red tape or political nightmare known as the school board, then GET YOUR CHILD OUT.
Do not hand your child over to the system and cheer because they have discovered this wonderful new toy known as the Common Core. It means absolutely nothing except that the system is taking control of our states and our children, and they "know" what's best for them. Better than the parents. TRUST THEM.
God bless those teachers who work themselves to the core, who care for the children in their care, and who love what they do despite the lack of appreciation from the kids AND parents. It's time to work together instead of against one another. I know some amazing teachers. I also know some who aren't. Do you know which one your child has?
More about Common Core and how the Feds are involved...
If you go to "the website" (which I'm not going to link) you will find their mission statement:
The Common Core State Standards provide a consistent, clear understanding of what students are expected to learn, so teachers and parents know what they need to do to help them. The standards are designed to be robust and relevant to the real world, reflecting the knowledge and skills that our young people need for success in college and careers. With American students fully prepared for the future, our communities will be best positioned to compete successfully in the global economy.
Then it goes on...
Building on the excellent foundation of standards states have laid, the Common Core State Standards are the first step in providing our young people with a high-quality education. It should be clear to every student, parent, and teacher what the standards of success are in every school.
Now, I don't believe that it matters AT ALL what the standards actually are. Because the truth is, there have always been standards. You can tweak this or that; you can totally revamp something, but it will not make ONE DENT in the outcome of American students. The "system" is still missing the point.
First, did you catch this, "The Common Core State Standards are the first step in providing our young people with a high-quality education." Really? This is the FIRST step? What have you people been doing for decades, then? What are WE paying you for, to use our kids as guinea pigs?!
If that wasn't bad enough, it seems that the "system" thinks that we are stupid enough to believe that changing this or that in "standards" is the solution to our poor educational outcomes. "If we can just fix THIS, all our problems are solved!"
Well, I hate to tell you this America, but the crappy teachers who hand out worksheets every day and text on their phones 24/7 aren't the problem. The math teachers who can't do fractions aren't the problem. The administrators who act like tyrants aren't the problem. The problem is ACCOUNTABILITY. It should not come from the top down, it should come from the parents up. The problem is that the schools have convinced the parents that their input is not necessary or wanted, and they have told them, "We are the professionals; we know what we are doing. Trust us."
TRUST US. Trust our mountains of paperwork, hours of testing and test prep; trust that we know when your child should eat, or run, or urinate... Trust that your child is learning what he should. Trust us when we feed your kids these GMOs and crappy food, and reward them with colorful candy. Oh, and trust the fluoridated water in our fountains, probably laced with lead from old pipes. And trust that we got a great education in our crappy school systems and know everything we need to know to teach your child.
The problem, parents, is you. Start using your voice and paying attention to what your kid needs to learn. Stop complaining about all the testing and stop sending your kid to be tested! Stop believing the fallacy that you are not integral to your child's success and WAKE UP and make it your priority. Go to your kid's school. See what's going on. If something is going on that you need changed and you can't get through the red tape or political nightmare known as the school board, then GET YOUR CHILD OUT.
Do not hand your child over to the system and cheer because they have discovered this wonderful new toy known as the Common Core. It means absolutely nothing except that the system is taking control of our states and our children, and they "know" what's best for them. Better than the parents. TRUST THEM.
God bless those teachers who work themselves to the core, who care for the children in their care, and who love what they do despite the lack of appreciation from the kids AND parents. It's time to work together instead of against one another. I know some amazing teachers. I also know some who aren't. Do you know which one your child has?
More about Common Core and how the Feds are involved...
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Growing Veggies
I blogged in January about starting a garden. It is now April, and I know what you are thinking. I flopped, right?
Wrong!! Sometimes I blog to hold myself accountable, and sometimes I do it because I know I will do what I say I am going to do. This is one of those times that I needed accountability. It helped that my neighbor started this journey with me, but I have to admit, it's hard to learn something knew and stay motivated knowing in the end, everything could die. Here is what I've got so far:
I've got three tomato plants, three bell peppers, and six banana peppers. Many did not "take" because I learned too late that they did not receive enough water. It's not too late for others, and I can always buy starter plants from the farmer's market to plant in my garden. For a first time, I feel like I'm doing all right. Here's the best part, though. My son and I built our own Garden Rack. Lowe's cut all the pieces for us, but we put all the pieces together using the plans, and it was actually not too bad! It was a great starter project for us. My son is almost 12, and got his own drill for Christmas. I enjoyed working on this project with him. We learned how to read plans as well as use tools.
Now if only the weather would cooperate and we could get our veggies planted outside. Yesterday was below freezing with freezing rain, and I'm glad my plants are still inside. Although, with the Garden Rack, I could always bring them back in, I suppose! I will keep you updated on our gardening adventure. Why don't you start your own?
Wrong!! Sometimes I blog to hold myself accountable, and sometimes I do it because I know I will do what I say I am going to do. This is one of those times that I needed accountability. It helped that my neighbor started this journey with me, but I have to admit, it's hard to learn something knew and stay motivated knowing in the end, everything could die. Here is what I've got so far:
Subway at Home
I love Subway. Well, I loved it more before getting a reminder recently about their inferior meats and pesticide-laden veggies. I mean, I never really thought a truly healthy sandwich could be made that cheaply, but figured they were making the real dough on sodas and chips, so... Anyway, I decided to save the gas money AND make a better sandwich at home!
This is how I do it. I use these awesome plastic "lunch" containers and fill them up with all our toppings. (You can see I need to get more lettuce!) Meat, cheese, and mayos/mustards are separate, but I could easily do a meat/cheese container. I keep ham and turkey on hand, as well as cheese, and numerous "sauces" such as Miracle Whip, mustard, dijon mustard, and chipotle mayo. I get the meat from the deli, fresh cut, and replace everything as necessary. This makes sandwich making much easier for kids who are too lazy to get out everything themselves. I replenish the veggies as they get low, usually as I'm making my own sub. These are super healthy foods for kids to eat daily. Not everything pictured is organic, but the cucumber, tomato, and bell pepper is.
Since I follow a "mostly no bread allowed" diet, I use a wrap for my sub instead and it is just as yummy. Think about setting up your own system before summer arrives and you will have well-fed kids and spouses all summer long!
Since I follow a "mostly no bread allowed" diet, I use a wrap for my sub instead and it is just as yummy. Think about setting up your own system before summer arrives and you will have well-fed kids and spouses all summer long!
Examples of Horrible Coaches
We've had our share of bad experiences over the years, in numerous sports and different towns. Bad coaches are everywhere. It is sad, really, and being a coach myself, I know how the parents who are often unequipped, or let's face it, LAZY, will judge every move we make with their kids. Nobody is perfect, but I respect the coaches who try. Here are some who just don't make the cut...
1. The screamer. They scream at the kids, call boys "girls" or "sissies", and obviously aren't happy until someone is crying. They believe they are coaching future pro sport athletes and if they don't scream at them, the kids will never reach their potential! Kids quit playing sports when they get tired of getting yelled at. True story. Ask a few kids who gave up a sport...
2. The cheater. Or the Liar. They are usually one and the same, and will not only cheat whenever possible, but will lie to cover it. They will lie to cover just about anything they need to in order to make themselves look good. The rules don't apply to them and they will bend them whenever possible. This teaches kids situational ethics. It only applies when it works in their favor. As parents, these coaches should not be tolerated.
3. The griper. During quarter or half-time breaks, instead of being constructive and moving forward with a plan, this coach complains about all the bad calls made previously, and how the referee must be out to get them. They dwell on the injustices and give nothing positive to the athletes about to take the field or court.
4. The pro. This coach expects everyone coming to him or her to have all necessary skills required for the sport and they are not about to teach any fundamentals to your child. If s/he doesn't have them already, too bad. On the first day of practice, kids are segregated into "starters" and "the rest" and often, not correctly. The "starters" get the "coaching" while "the rest" are turned over to the assistant coach who does "whatever" with them. But it's not skills. Just shoot the ball, it doesn't matter how...
5. The blind. These coaches are usually the ones who play their child (or other relatives) over other, more talented players. As a matter of fact, they usually don't see the talent that other players have because they are more concerned with building the team around "their" child and not taking stock of the many talents of the rest of the team. I literally watched one of the best players sit the bench for half of a game so that the two relatives of one coach could play almost the whole game. The blind coach also doesn't take stock of the strengths of their weaker players. If an athlete can't do "X," they write him off, even though he can do "Y" exceptionally well. This often happens at the team's peril. It does nothing for the child's self esteem.
The blind also fails to see the positive because he is too busy seeing the negative. He is mad at the rest of the team for letting that player get so far down field. He grimaces at the one who stopped him, instead of recognizing that child's accomplishment. This coach is often a screamer as well.
Well, there you have it. I'm glad I got that off my chest. Now you may be wondering, what DO parents expect? As a coach, my goal is to teach as much as my team can handle. But individual children have different starting points and you have to adjust. It's okay to get frustrated without yelling. And kids want to have fun, but they would also like to win some games. My attitude is this: I don't care if we lose every single game, as long as we get better each time. Coming down on kids because they lost a game does nothing. Building the skills and helping them gain confidence is much more positive for the kids and the team as a whole. I've coached four sports now and some really awesome kids. I can't imagine being a miserable coach who only cares about winning. What do the children really learn?
1. The screamer. They scream at the kids, call boys "girls" or "sissies", and obviously aren't happy until someone is crying. They believe they are coaching future pro sport athletes and if they don't scream at them, the kids will never reach their potential! Kids quit playing sports when they get tired of getting yelled at. True story. Ask a few kids who gave up a sport...
2. The cheater. Or the Liar. They are usually one and the same, and will not only cheat whenever possible, but will lie to cover it. They will lie to cover just about anything they need to in order to make themselves look good. The rules don't apply to them and they will bend them whenever possible. This teaches kids situational ethics. It only applies when it works in their favor. As parents, these coaches should not be tolerated.
3. The griper. During quarter or half-time breaks, instead of being constructive and moving forward with a plan, this coach complains about all the bad calls made previously, and how the referee must be out to get them. They dwell on the injustices and give nothing positive to the athletes about to take the field or court.
4. The pro. This coach expects everyone coming to him or her to have all necessary skills required for the sport and they are not about to teach any fundamentals to your child. If s/he doesn't have them already, too bad. On the first day of practice, kids are segregated into "starters" and "the rest" and often, not correctly. The "starters" get the "coaching" while "the rest" are turned over to the assistant coach who does "whatever" with them. But it's not skills. Just shoot the ball, it doesn't matter how...
5. The blind. These coaches are usually the ones who play their child (or other relatives) over other, more talented players. As a matter of fact, they usually don't see the talent that other players have because they are more concerned with building the team around "their" child and not taking stock of the many talents of the rest of the team. I literally watched one of the best players sit the bench for half of a game so that the two relatives of one coach could play almost the whole game. The blind coach also doesn't take stock of the strengths of their weaker players. If an athlete can't do "X," they write him off, even though he can do "Y" exceptionally well. This often happens at the team's peril. It does nothing for the child's self esteem.
The blind also fails to see the positive because he is too busy seeing the negative. He is mad at the rest of the team for letting that player get so far down field. He grimaces at the one who stopped him, instead of recognizing that child's accomplishment. This coach is often a screamer as well.
Well, there you have it. I'm glad I got that off my chest. Now you may be wondering, what DO parents expect? As a coach, my goal is to teach as much as my team can handle. But individual children have different starting points and you have to adjust. It's okay to get frustrated without yelling. And kids want to have fun, but they would also like to win some games. My attitude is this: I don't care if we lose every single game, as long as we get better each time. Coming down on kids because they lost a game does nothing. Building the skills and helping them gain confidence is much more positive for the kids and the team as a whole. I've coached four sports now and some really awesome kids. I can't imagine being a miserable coach who only cares about winning. What do the children really learn?
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